Thurston, Not Thurston
When I was young I named a mouse Thurston.
Thurston was killed by my cat.
So I wanted to name my child Thurston.
I felt like if it would be a boy, it would be suitable.
But if it would be a girl, it would be really perfect.
Though kids would call the kid “Thirst’n.”
And the name would seem out of place, probably.
Everyone I knew was named “Brandon.”
When I was ten I first heard Sonic Youth.
At fifteen I learned the name, “Thurston Moore.”
At twenty I knew so many people who knew that name.
I realized I could never have “Thurston” for myself.
It was imbued with too much meaning.
I didn’t even like half their catalogue.
Thurston Moore ruins everything.
But still, when I wear a brown cardigan
or use my book embosser,
I think “Thurston.”
Like
it’s someone
I had,
loved,
and lost.
9/11/10
New Poems
THINGS ON MY STICKIES 9/10/10
Always talk to God
never listen to cops. – Lil Wayne
You're not the first or the last
but you're something and that's something. - Abe Froman
Why aren't I as good as everyone at everything?
"The Earth is a farm. We are someone else's property."
The cry of 'Flower Power' echoes through the land.
We shall not wilt." Abbie Hoffman
Charlie Rose keeps raising his voice at Tony Blair.
Asimov last something
People from New England seem like they like life.
Trepanation For The Nation
Trying to keep blogging so I don't cry.
TIME OF TROUBLES
Asimov last something
People from New England seem like they like life.
Trepanation For The Nation
Trying to keep blogging so I don't cry.
TIME OF TROUBLES
Somehow listening to Avail.
Trepanation doesn't seem so weird.
feel-ups
"Found a bunch of weed.”
feel-ups
"Found a bunch of weed.”
Start a reading series called, "Beyonce."
"You Ain't Got To Be Locked Up To Be In Prison."
"You Ain't Got To Be Locked Up To Be In Prison."
Object of difference
Oh, we all grow up and regress to the mean.
'tournicoter' (to turn round and round (or back and forth) in small circles)
'tournicoter' (to turn round and round (or back and forth) in small circles)
Ethics and Aesthetics are one. Ludwig Wittgenstein
Whatever I am I am so much of it.
In this sense, the rejection of a single majority belief relies on other majority beliefs.
Untitled
Mediocrity drips off me like my broken faucet, like drip, drip, drip, like all the time, like non-stop, like it infuses the room with drip smell, with mediocrity residue, mediocrity runoff, i.e. me, like I'm dripping off my tepid life essence, like I'm only half full anyways, and it costs more to fix than replace.
Whatever I am I am so much of it.
In this sense, the rejection of a single majority belief relies on other majority beliefs.
Untitled
Mediocrity drips off me like my broken faucet, like drip, drip, drip, like all the time, like non-stop, like it infuses the room with drip smell, with mediocrity residue, mediocrity runoff, i.e. me, like I'm dripping off my tepid life essence, like I'm only half full anyways, and it costs more to fix than replace.
Plz-Circle-Pit-Directly-On-My-Face
You can stay
You can stay
in my bed tonight
and every night after
and don't worry about
jokes/laughter.
You can stay
until you need to leave
and don't worry about
making me believe
someone wants me.
Repeat that you are just being clear.
Repeat whatever you want to hear.
But oh,
plz just walk me,
walk me home from the party,
walk me home from the party,
walk me home from the party.
plz just walk me,
walk me home from the party,
walk me home from the party,
walk me home from the party.
Nature Morte
I'll look at your old
profile pictures
because it will make
me feel shitty about
my life.
I'll look at your old
profile pictures
because it will make
me feel shitty about
my life.
POEM FOR DRUNK RUNNERS
Drunk runners:
Are you getting
to where you are going
faster than me?
How fast do you think that to be,
whilst running drunkenly?
Are you “goals-oriented,”
or merely concerned?
The morning after,
do your calves burn?
And just how does it feel,
And just how does it feel,
does it even feel real?
Is drunk running
something I have to do
to feel?
to feel?
- + - + - +MATH+ - + - + -
My Angle Of Depression
Is One So That You Must
Stand On Your Tippy-Toes
On Very Top Your So-And-Sos
And Every Letter Of Correspondence Sent
And Bend Like Your Back Has Never Bent
See The Lacuna Under My Pillows Like A Tent?
L & M
Helsinki girl,
1960,
inscribes insignia
in the skin
of a kallio in
Suomenlinna.
Another,
from ’44,
sits nearby
warm, a
pile of past.
Carved-in
crest w/
water tower,
sailboat,
sun;
it’s composed
too close:
its Gulf
is to suffocate.
Its initials
are weatherworn
and hers,
saltwater
cut.
She starts now,
she starts her own,
starts in
w/ chisel,
makes her circle,
curves her initials
inside;
and three loops
in her L
and three humps
in her M.
“I was four in ‘44
and the war was on.
But now, it’s July,”
she says to a friend,
“and the darkness will
never come.”
A Post-War Personne.
Helsinki girl,
1960,
inscribes insignia
in the skin
of a kallio in
Suomenlinna.
Another,
from ’44,
sits nearby
warm, a
pile of past.
Carved-in
crest w/
water tower,
sailboat,
sun;
it’s composed
too close:
its Gulf
is to suffocate.
Its initials
are weatherworn
and hers,
saltwater
cut.
She starts now,
she starts her own,
starts in
w/ chisel,
makes her circle,
curves her initials
inside;
and three loops
in her L
and three humps
in her M.
“I was four in ‘44
and the war was on.
But now, it’s July,”
she says to a friend,
“and the darkness will
never come.”
A Post-War Personne.
The 20th-century is just, like, never going to end.
Like, we might run into Tatlin or O'Hara tonight,
Because it's 4:30, we have a roof, so we just need another hour
for a 12-pack at Mike's.
I hear you,
"... war which led to that war which caused that war…
"... war which led to that war which caused that war…
…inexorably this world."
And what are we arguing over, really?
(Land grabs,
handholds,
ideology,
old homes.)
ideology,
old homes.)
I'd like to break out...
Not have these incising lines on my map,
Need that "delete all" that hasn't been invented yet.
Triggers trigger triggers - we all know things like that.
So, at an impasse:
So, at an impasse:
He thinks, (Us out of North America.)
She thinks, (Us out of North America.)
They say,
"Us.
Out.
Of.
North America."
"Us.
Out.
Of.
North America."
Poem For A. Plank
Was called 'bleary-eyed' today.
Feel bleary-based,
like the constitutive parts
of my physical being
are made w/ blear.
Feel gray and light pink.
FOOD = $$$$$: ISN’T THAT ACTUALLY CRAZY?
The stomach is a commodity,
pork barrel to be traded on an open market
for not spending money,
to have money to keep,
somewhere for you – not food,
Not full is fulfilling,
it connects you to a heritage
of the underclass of the mass,
who have felt full of human feelings of humanity,
of a body (of having a body – of being somebody w/ a body).
To chisel out a more gaunt version
is to see money earned.
Though not enough for debt, or
enough to be spent, but still,
if you ate what you can afford
you would be -still hungry-.
My friends fast for capital.
--------------------------------------
But those with too much can afford too look neither too little nor too much.
They look fresh out the package
like choice hasn’t touched them yet
like something cast in marble or built by slaves
just standing there, never fluctuate
according to the time of the month or
whether they worked, or whether their roommate brought something home or
if the dumpster has been left alone.
--------------------------------------
A pound lost is a pound earned,
is “just one pound of flesh.”
We eat lest…
They look fresh out the package
like choice hasn’t touched them yet
like something cast in marble or built by slaves
just standing there, never fluctuate
according to the time of the month or
whether they worked, or whether their roommate brought something home or
if the dumpster has been left alone.
--------------------------------------
A pound lost is a pound earned,
is “just one pound of flesh.”
We eat lest…
MONTREAL
I am reading Reality Sandwiches,
Sitting on a terrace in Montreal,
And all Ginsberg keeps doing
Is listing names of cities,
Like that’s enough.
When O’Hara does it,
It’s charming.
When Allen does it,
It’s demanding.
Is it enough?
Why do people who do things
Feel the need - go places
and say they went there?
I don’t even want to read Ginsberg,
but it’s him or Veblen
and I just want to enjoy
Montreal.
Professional Affiliations of Everyone Ever KissedI am reading Reality Sandwiches,
Sitting on a terrace in Montreal,
And all Ginsberg keeps doing
Is listing names of cities,
Like that’s enough.
When O’Hara does it,
It’s charming.
When Allen does it,
It’s demanding.
Is it enough?
Why do people who do things
Feel the need - go places
and say they went there?
I don’t even want to read Ginsberg,
but it’s him or Veblen
and I just want to enjoy
Montreal.
Activist
Activist
Actor
Artist
Artist
Artist
Artist
Artist
Artist Assistant
Artist Assistant
Au Pair
Bartender
Curator
Dancer
Designer
Designer
Designer
Designer
Food Services
Food Services
Hair Stylist
Media Relations
Military
Model
Museum Worker
Museum Worker
Museum Worker
Musician
Musician
Musician
N/A: Dead
Parent
Parent
Parent
Retail
Retail
Retail
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Student
Teacher
Teacher
Teacher
Teacher
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Unclear
Volunteer
Writer
THIS ANGRY SILENCE
- trying to write something good all day -
keep thinking “TVP”:
“spend all day writing silly poetry
for the girl I love who doesn’t love me.”
don’t understand
why I didn’t
--------and--------
cannot write that
over and over again,
copy and pasted 100X,
“tagged” on all of our roofs
so we look out in the morning
and remember it forever.
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1 comment:
dez pums. i like much.
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